It’s easy to think of travelling as lazing on peaceful beaches achieving that gorgeous bronzed look that is almost impossible to achieve naturally in rain-drenched England. And whilst we did spend many a day on deserted white sand beaches, we also discovered that a beach can be less than relaxing.

Our visit to Australia coincided with the dreaded jellyfish season. Those dastardly critters meant we couldn’t go in the sea north of Brisbane. But even south of Brisbane my friend got stung by a Portuguese man-o-war which caused severe pains in her armpit and her wrist to blister. However, unlike the jellyfish further north, it didn’t kill her within the hour and so we were grateful.

And then there are the Vietnamese and Cambodian beaches... Our first experience of a Vietnamese beach was a disturbing one; we were in a town called Na Trang where the main attraction, according to the guide books, was the beach. After laying out our towels on the sand our first sight was of a woman, crouching fully clothed by the sea with her trousers around her ankles. After relieving her bladder in full view of us and everyone else on the beach, she came over to my friend and I and stared at us without talking for an uncomfortable few minutes whilst we got into our bikinis and put on our suncream. Then, she offered to thread our legs for us to remove the hair. Unsurprisingly, we declined.

We found out that women clamouring to de-hair unfortunate tourists’ legs are not uncommon in south-east Asia. I once had a young girl stroking my legs and exclaiming ‘hairy! hairy!’ whilst shaking her head, in the hope that I would succumb to her threading technique.

South-east Asian beaches also have a bustling trade of pastries, crisps, chewing gum, sweets and lychees. As soon as a tourist is spotted the children and women sellers make a beeline and most will not leave until something is bought. One time in Vietnam, we were accosted by a young man who, despite the oppressive heat, was wearing a pinstriped shirt and smart trousers (with flip flops nonetheless). He was selling postcards and asked us if we wanted any. We said no. He asked us again. We declined. He sat down. One hour later he had told us the story of why he needed us to buy his postcards and we had bought 20 between us.