Proponents of polygamy point to other pluses of the system. They argue that it recognises the different biological drives of men and women. Women are genetically predispositioned to seek a stable environment with a strong provider in order to ensure the best chance of survival for their children. For men the best chance to ensure the survival of their genetic material is to inseminate as many women as possible. Many intellectuals and feminists have put forward hypothesis that human beings are more than their biological urges but to completely subscribe to such theories is to ignore the evidence that up to 30-40% of men worldwide exhibit polygamous behaviour through extra marital affairs and that women engage in consanguineous marriages in the search for better partners.

Islam didn't invent polygamy. It is a fairly universal institution that was known in many ancient religions, including Judaism, Christianity and Hinduism. Polygamy is still practised today in West Africa, throughout the Middle East and by Mormons in America. It was present in Arabia before the Qur'an was revealed to Mohammed but the Qur'an regulated the extent and nature of polygamy with strict guidelines that all wives have to be treated absolutely equally. In the Kurdish inhabited areas of Turkey it is estimated that between 10% and 25% of relationships are polygamous and around 58% of the women in polygamous marriages live together in one house with the other wife/ wives. While these relationships are not always stress free and many women complain about serious problems with the other wives it is also true that in over 50% of such marriages the women either arranged the second marriage themselves or entered into the arrangemment of their own will.

Angry Harry’s website (www.angryharry.com - not a serious study and openly misogynist) unwittingly accurately lists some of the pros for women of polygamy, Harry says; ‘....think of all the time that this polygamy idea would save for each of the wives. Instead of doing three chores each, they would each only have to do just one!.....The vacuuming, the dusting and the window cleaning could all be divided equally into three separate parts......and isn't this what women actually say that they want ....equality, and a reduction in the housework?’. Certainly in the labour intensive agricultural societies of south eastern Turkey this must hold some appeal.

Additionally consider this, problem pages all over the world regularly feature letters from sex ‘starved’ husbands and badgered wives. Sexual research done in Europe suggests that a woman’s sex drive kicks in every 10 days and a man’s at least every 5 days leading to the disparity in expectations and again polygamy provides a practical solution.

Not every aspect of polygamy is about practicality or men demonstrating their status though, some of the marriages serve political purposes whereby in order to avert a skirmish or a feud with another tribe or group, a key male marries into that tribe or group. Cupid also has a role. Remzi Oto, a sociologist at Dicle University in Diyarbakir conducted a study of 50 polygamous men and showed that nearly a third took a second wife after “falling in love”. Most were forced into marriage in their early teens or promised to a family while still children. For these men; ‘Choosing their own wife is a form of self-assertion, a way of exploring their manhood and of experiencing true love,’ says Mr Oto.

Reşat Yağdı, a Kurdish electrician and onion farmer, has a wife and three children and is preparing to take his second wife. The process will enhance his status in the area where he lives but is not easy or cheap. He must build his second wife her own house and pay her bride price and wedding costs. He thinks the total cost will be around £18,000 but believes it’s worth it, his first marriage is an unhappy one and says; ‘Ayşe is so feminine. She is everything I've ever dreamt of. She's my perfect type.’

What his first wife thinks of his ‘perfect’ new wife is not mentioned and though there can undoubtedly be benefits to women as a result of polygamy there is a darker side too that is often the reality for many women. Loyal wives are pensioned off in to an artificial an early menopaues as they are replaced in their husband’s affections by younger models.

Some polygamous households thrive and can become huge and yet even those vigorously practising polygamy can see that it creates social issues. Mehmet Arslan Ağa, the sprightly, pot-bellied, 64-year-old Kurdish village chieftain from Işıklar seems an unlikely defender of monogamy as he has five wives, 55 children, 80 grandchildren and small army of servants but insists if he had his time again he would only marry once.

Although his large number of wives underline his powerful status he has found it a challenge to build each wife a house far from the others to prevent them from competing and struggles to remember all of his children's names. He recently saw two young boys fighting on the street and intervened breaking up the fight and telling them they would bring shame on their families. ‘Don’t you recognize me?’ one of them said, ‘I’m your son.’ His biggest headache though, he says, stems from jealousy among the wives, the first of whom he married out of love. ‘My rule is to behave equally toward all of my wives,’ he says; ‘but the first wife was very, very jealous when the second wife came. When the third arrived, the first two created an alliance against her. So I have to be a good diplomat.’

Apart from the need to play marital referee, Mehmet, who owns land, real estate, and shops throughout the region, says that the financial burden of so many offspring can be overwhelming. He explains; ‘When I go to the shoe shop, I buy 100 pairs of shoes at a time. The clerk at the store thinks I'm a shoe salesman and tells me to go visit a wholesaler’. Despite his fecund lifestyle Mehmet Ağa acknowledges that polygamy is an outmoded practice and has taken personal steps to ensure that it is coming to a halt in his village. He has banned his own sons from taking second wives and is educating his daughters, he will not allow them to become second wives. He claims that his situation derives from his ignorance and the need to make tribal alliances; ‘I was uneducated back then, and Allah commands us to be fruitful and multiply but having so many wives can create problems, if you want to be happy, marry one wife.’